Things got out of hand today...

So. Verdict is in. HEB grapefruit water is AWESOME! Earlier today I was about to lie on the floor with flu sickness. Now, I'm starting to come to... Yes!

Is HEB sparkly water just as good?

It turns out my fav flav "grapefruit/pamplemousse" is not easily available outside the cramped quarters of Whole Foods. HEB offers a generic. Let's put it to the test!

Cinnabutt 880 Torture

I'm not sure why I do this. Look @ recipes I know I cannot have. Cinnabon has been reverse-engineered at a whopping 880 calories for the original and a pared-down version on Dr. Oz. I cannot even have the Dr. Oz version. I used to fly from the Dallas Love Airport. Cinnabon everywhere. I indulged once. And paid the price. @@@@@@@@@@@@ oh...little sticky buns, you stick on my buns. You make me sick. You make me thick. Not even potato flour can save you. Sigh. http://www.topsecretrecipes.com/Cinnabon-Cinnamon-Rolls-Low-Fat/Low-Calorie.html
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LaCroix helped me quit Diet Coke

12 cans a day. That's how many Diet Cokes I used to go through @ a high-stress job. 12. I used to buy cases when they were on sale 4 for $10. Now my current job offers them for free. Diet Coke addict. That was me. Then I found LaCroix. By accident. I thought I wanted a cold, sweet drink. All flavorings were poisoned by corn and/or soy or Caramel Color (dairy). LaCroix. I was wary of "flavoring". I called. The lady was so nice and assured me that the flavors were from the actual fruits, not artificial. Cold. Fizzy. Grapefruit. In my hand, slogging it down as I stare at my demanding computer. Every day. 6 a day. Water. I'm drinking water.

Ch ch Cha CHIA!

Chia pets. 'Member those? Ever get one? (I wish) Ever paid $20 for one? (No). It was always the most fought-over white elephant tho, right? Turns out we should have been EATING those seeds instead of painting them on clay sheep. I have finally found a way to eat disgusting egg whites. Modified "breakfast muffin": from Dr Oz: 1/4 cup ground flax
1 tsp baking powder
2 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp coconut oil
1 egg
1 packet stevia. Cook for 55sec or more in microwave. SPRINKLE w CHIA seeds! Ch Ch Cha muffin! Soooo good :p. Taste:Tacktastic! I'm testing whether I can handle the ground flaxseed. I got a bit "Winnie the Pooh" puffy yesterday, so, not sure if that was from flaxseed or something I ingested a few days ago. If it is, I can substitute potato flour. So, an experiment! EGGScellent!

PeaNUTTY experiment

Ever wonder how many peanuts are in a salty peanut bar? 10-15. Oh yes I did. I made a mess picking these 2 bars apart today to get to the peanuts. That's how I roll. Without the goo. Just the protein, thanks. Small pear on the side...

Do Not eat the Donut!

Catered meetings. Why do the orderers think we are 12 and need sprinkles? Case in point: the Donut box. Staring at me. LARD. SUGAR. WHEAT. MILK. SPRINKLES(corn syrup I bet). I feel dizzy. 5 long hours between breakfast and lunch. I finally make it to lunch and what is on the menu? Wraps with WHEAT, MAYO (dairy), salad dressing (Corn syrup) and potato chips (soybean oil). I give up and wolf it down. Arrgggg. I'm paying for it now but man did it taste good on the way down...

Forget e-Harmony. Take pictures of your food!

If you are single and want to meet people, I suggest going to a restaurant, sitting @ the bar and taking pictures of your food. People are so curious! Tonight I"m @ Fish Daddy's seafood crab-stuffed shrimp. I bet on an "on" night it could be great. Shrimp is overcooked. Place is packed. Broccoli rules.

Disco Diva and Whole Food Hell

I met w my nutritionist yesterday who knew I was an enigma. I'm her toughest case (not proud of that). I had forgotten to tell her that I am insulin resistant (sugar gets stuck in my muscles and cannot feed my cells). The only way I know to get the glycogen out is to lift weights or excercise. (Dr Oz). She told me "well, no wonder! Being pre-diabetic means that I have to excercise a min of 30mins/day but not get my heart rate up (that's why interval training/having a trainer at one time and spinning don't work for me. A high heart rate releases insulin-to which I am resistant. Getting it too high will push me into being type 2. No wonder and thank god (I hated the 5AM class and was getting no results). I did what I enjoy a lot-dancing! I turned on the TV and put it on trance/dance music-being careful NOT to get into Flashdance Manic mode. I can do this! Whole Foods Hell: Unlike dancing, I hate going to Whole Foods. The 2 I have access to are understaffed and over crowded. Narrow aisles and displays in the aisles, making it worse. Ugh. They didn't have Red clover tea, Raspberry Ketones and CLA. The CLA they did have was full of soy, sugar etc-seriously?! The 1 bright spot was speaking to an elderly woman looking @ Chia seeds. She had never heard of a Chia pet or seen the Dr Oz show. I said "oh, girl, you have a DVR? The recording thing? Just do a search on "Oz" and you will find it. It comes on channel 13 @ 3". And helped her pick out some Chia seeds. She was so thankful and so was I. I did find LaCroix in 'grapefruit' and some edible flowers-awesome!

Support of the Antarctic Kittens

ArggGggg. I have to go to Whole Foods. In person. Yea, you know what I mean. Exiting the freeway. Parking a ways a way. Walking into it, with heels. Helpful people but narrow aisles and sensory overload. And guilt. "Maybe I SHOULD buy a CD at the counter to support Antarctic kittens, but its all plastic, and I could just Itunes it..and I don't really like the music..now why did I come IN here?" I have to look @ vitamin labels because where I usually get my vitamins (Amazon) does not post nutrition labels always. Dang. FD&C #40 red dye. Not good for ADHD apparently. I must have ingested some yesterday because I thought I would channel the lead singer of Chevelle and rock out in my Living Room last night. I did something to my knee.. : / My car is not electric.
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Snacktime "It's a LaCroix, sweetie! A LaCroix!"

Today was so much better @ Snacktime!
*Chicken Lettuce Wrap.
*a hard-to-open orange.
*LaCroix which is helping me get off Diet Coke and rather reminds me of "Absolutely Fabulous" episode...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFqHlliWmVY

Caramel Colored Cow and Corn (and Wheat)

Caramel Coloring. Dang. Its in many things including Diet Coke. And beer. It's made from: CORN! MILK! WHEAT! Arrrgggg-kill me now!
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GLOP!

Dinner tonight is easy.No dry, tasteless turkey or chicken
No carbs
Level: Easy
Taste: Tacktastic!

GLOP!
Glop (as it is lovingly or sarcastically refered to) is

*1Cup "NOW" brand egg white protein
*1/2 Cup Stevia in the Raw
*1 heaping large spoonful (the kind in your kitchen drawer) of Baking Chocolate Powder
*2 Handfuls ice
Blend it in a blender
Drink up!
Eat the foam with the chocolate spoon!
Keep rest in fridge and reblend to fluff it up :p

Other names for GLOP! are "EWW SICK!", "Are you really going to EAT that?" and "GROSS"

A word of caution:
When first opening "NOW" egg white protein jar, let it air out with the lid off for a few hours. Opened fresh, it has this horrible ammonia smell (well, I can smell it).
Then put it in fridge.

Snacktime and You Can Even Eat the DISHES!

Snacktime. yuck. 2x day :(

*2 oz lean protein (homemade turkey breast meatloaf-I DO recommend "Perfect Meatloaf" pans...)
*whole fruit (organic and free at work-thank you work!)

10 AM. At work.

Paper plates "compostable? www.eproducts.com
(at first I was reading it upside down and thought "what the..."). I went to the website.

Plates made from sugar cane fiber. ruh roh
I could find nothing about testing these puppies in a microwave. omg. what if they give off cane sugar? I saw what cane sugar did to my arm in testing-an angry red welt about 4" in diameter.
I phoned.

The lady was very nice and said she would ask her manager and email me.
She did
No sugar.
I'm going to bring my own plate anyway.

The Candyman says "you can even eat the DISHES!" horrible childhood flashbacks...ahhh!!!
I'm trying to quit Diet Coke. It's hard. "I thought I had found a panacea in this "Simply Squeeze" (on LEFT) water flavorer er..water treatment.

After work, I happily stopped at my neighborhood grocery and went to pick up another bottle. To my horror: SUCRALOSE (corn) AHHH! Nooo!!

Plan B: "Remain calm. Get Kool Aid and use Stevia and make your own."
CORNSTARCH in the KOOL AID?!
I'm trying not to cry....Crystal Light (CORN!), Any "water treatment" (CORN!)
Deep Breath.

Plan C: Recheck water aisle. Walk past couple arguing over quitting alcohol...
LaCroix.
I've had this before. Was good. "Sparkling Water, 'Natural Flavors' "
What does that MEAN?

I went to website on phone "Sorry, you need flash!" No, I don't....
I phoned.
The lady was very nice and said she would look that up for me, asked if it was food allergies       (omg, the word is OUT). "Yes"
"Flavored by strawberries, blueberries and raspberries" she said.
Whew.
I bought it.
HOOK LINE and WATER TREATMENT.

Recipe 1 Chicken Wraps

Level: Easy
Taste: Tacktastic!
6oz is about the full size of your hand

*6oz of lean cookd chicken (ground chicken breast or Jennie O turkey tenderloins)

 (slow cooked & pre-frozen with veggies is great. The veggies give the chicken moisture (thanks, mom!)).

*put handful of veggies like can of green chilies, some jarred mild red peppers, carrots, whatever in chicken
*heat for 1 min

*4 leaves of butter lettuce (iceburg ok too)

Sauce (mix all in a cup):
*1/3 C vinegar
*1/4 C or less of Stevia in the Raw
*Sesame seeds-3Tablespoons
*1T hot chili sauce (the Vietnamese one with the rooster on it)

Put cooked chicken in the butter lettuce on a plate. Drizzle with Sauce. YUM

What does LEAN really MEAN? Check labels!

What the heck is "lean"?

Nutrition labels fooled even me without the help of my nutritionist:

Look @ total calories,
example: 110
Take your phone calculator and type 110 * .20
Should = 22
Look @ "Calories from fat"
That should be less than the number you just calculated
22 or less is good
23 or more is higher in fat. ruh roh.

Check a tuna can-depending on the time of year it was harvested, the tuna may be high in fat and not have been "workin' out"...

SOY BEANS?! oh no for me!






Can anyone say "fatty tuna soy soy!!"

Tacktasticness and cookbooks

For years my mother (a gourmand) has been trying to get me to cook, sending mail clippings and emails to no avail. "Pintrest" who has me on some snotty-girl lockout "waitlist" posts cupcakes (thanks, I'm itchy now) and wood-nymph-impossible-hairdos.

So, as my revenge, I post this blog of my own "tackboard". Tacktastic!!

I bought several cookbooks from the used bookstore today and am wondering this:

"Can I possibly make a decent set of recipes that I can eat from these cookbooks?":

*"The Kid Friendly ADHD & Austim Cookbook" (yes, I do have unmedicated ADHD...)
*Perfect Chinese (because I'm learning Mandarin and like PF Chang Lettuce Wraps)
*Once-a-month cooking (because I work or travel full time)
*Paula Deen's Savannah cookbook (because she said she loved "mashed potatoes n cigarettes")
*Better Homes and Gardens New Cookbook 15th edition (because its a classic!)

I hate food

I am allergic to:
*corn  (all the "dex" es except "Dexter" - I like that show)
*dairy (whey, casein, "lac", hydolyzed veg protein)
*soy   (I used to make my own tofu :( -messy but fun, MSG)
*wheat
*cane sugar

My Doctor and nutritionist have suggested a low fat/no grain diet
*no oatmeal, rice etc
*Foods (meats) with 20% fat or less

For personal reasons, I try to choose foods in which the animal lead a fair life and was killed humanely and quickly:
You know what I'm talking about-happy roaming chickens, happy roaming cows, happy piggies, no hormones (although mine make me happy, but I digress...), no endangered species "um here is some 'special turtle soup for you'... no thanks.

"moooo!" yay! Sorry, I may eat you.
"bok bok" yay! Sorry I may eat you.
"swim swim our population is okay" yay! Sorry I may eat you.

I tried being vegetarian. I tried being vegan. I could do neither, and so, they were eaten. : /